Jason Biggs's Wife is Fantastic

 

Jason Biggs must have balls that are rubies and a dick made entirely of chocolate and Nicolas Sparks novels.  That is the only reason I can fathom to explain how he somehow found a wife that was willing to pay for a hooker to have sex with him for his birthday while she watched.  And my mom always told me there were no perfect women...via UsWeekly:

 The Orange Is the New Black star then attempted to explain what happened, keeping in mind that he was on daytime television.
"I didn't have a good time in the end," he admitted. "It took three ladies over the course of three different days. Let's just say I didn't complete the mission. My wife found the whole thing to be quite hysterical even while it was happening. She was actually on the bed, watching, eating a bag of chips, laughing, so as you can imagine, I wasn't really performing to the best of my abilities. Also, said prostitute wasn't engaging with my wife the way I hoped she would and so it all kind of fell apart, and the rest is in the book." 

Now maybe this is all a shameless attempt at plugging his wife's book, but regardless,  she bought him a hooker.  And that, ladies is the way to a man's boner.  Also, cheese fries and bacon...I hope you're taking notes.