Kiss of death essay...
Because her goal is to have a bigger arrest record than Mike Tyson, with half as much sexual assault, Lindsay Lohan punched somebody last night.  Via Daily News: 
Trouble-magnet Lindsay Lohan was busted yet again early Thursday in a chic Manhattan nightclub  after punching another woman in a battle of the blondes, police sources  said.
“Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?” the 26-year-old starlet said,  according to TMZ.com, after cops slapped on the handcuffs outside the Chelsea  hotspot Avenue around 4 a.m.
 The “Mean Girls” star, 26, was bolting from the nightclub in a friend’s car  when police stopped her and brought her to the 10th Precinct stationhouse, the  celebrity web site reported.
 Her alleged victim, Tiffany Eve Mitchell, 28, was also questioned at the W.  20th St. police station, but was released.
 Lohan was issued a desk appearance ticket and is due in court Jan. 11.  Later, she was rushed out of the stationhouse with a coat covering her head.
 Lohan — a veteran of five trips to rehab — was accompanied by a man and they  left the Chelsea precinct in a black Escalade. She was still dressed for a night  of clubbing: Leggings, a green mini skirt and high-heels.
Damn...five trips to rehab and like a hundred court appearences? *Let's seeee...carry the five, minus the one...jams keys on calculator*  Yep! got it...female troubles.  Case closed.

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